


Misery Business

by ItWasAlwaysYou



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angry Peter Parker, Cutting, Self-Harm, Teen Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:07:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24067858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ItWasAlwaysYou/pseuds/ItWasAlwaysYou
Summary: Peter doesn’t want to “recover”, he doesn’t need to change. This is just who he is, so what’s the problem?
Kudos: 38





	Misery Business

Peter didn’t understand why he “had” to get better. 

He was so sick of hearing the same corny phrases, the amount of times he’s been told “recovery isn’t linear” pissed him off to no end. If recovery isn’t linear who’s to say that recovery for him wasn’t possible? Who’s to say that he was meant to recover? 

Peter was a good person, Peter saved people. He spent all of his time either working on school work or running around New York City, a masked vigilante. Peter helped people. 

He couldn't understand why ever since Tony saw the red lines scattered throughout his body on a scan he wanted to help him. He had so little control over his life who was Tony to tell him what he could and couldn’t do. 

Peter didn’t choose for his parents to die when he was so young. 

Peter didn’t choose to be bullied.

Peter didn’t choose to be bitten by a radioactive spider. (I mean seriously? who would just decide that)

Peter hardly had a choice in becoming an avenger at sixteen.

Peter had no part in choosing his fate. The only choice he had was to pick up the blade when he was thirteen. And so what if he cut himself. Tony told him so many times in an attempt to get through to him that, “he didn’t view him as any less because of this” 

So why stop. 

It was a coping mechanism, perhaps a messed up, misguided one, but it was a coping mechanism nonetheless.

And who was Tony to tell him that he wasn’t allowed to cope how he saw fit? 

He was a good person, he helped people, he was smart and he was capable of making his own decisions. And seeing how fate had screwed him over maybe he was better off making his own decisions. 

So when Tony attempted to “help” him it only made him angry. He didn’t need to be saved. He was perfectly capable of protecting himself. He knew, and he knew that Tony knew that if he wanted to die he would be dead by now.

So what was the problem, his grades were good, he still made all of his patrols and was as helpful and kind as ever. So what was the problem? If it weren’t for that stupid AI, Tony wouldn’t even know.

He had been like this for longer than Tony even knew he existed. He’d been like this for longer than he knew most of his friends, or gone to Midtown. There was no changes in behavior or personality, there was barely anything for anyone to notice. This was just who he was, and who was some billionaire playboy to tell him that he had to change who he was.

**Author's Note:**

> I’m not sure how I feel about this, I know it doesn’t really fit Peter’s character but I kind of like the idea that it’s at least partially a facade and I was listening to Green Day so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ If you have any suggestions or criticisms please let me know!!


End file.
